The lost pray Revoked solicitations of solemn meditations echo fallacies inside the emptiness of my spirit Relentlessly I’ve tried to multiply these stifled cries of redemption trusting that repetition will miraculously strengthen my anemic petitions. Even the rudiments of good religion have been found to be insufficient for my disposition Leaving my appeal for favorable transition to become nothing more than worthless wishing Could I haphazardly be omitting some significant piece of wisdom or could it be that my absenteeism took precedence on the days of spiritual intuition’s intervention to make amends. Then again perhaps my belief alone is simply a psychological illusion from controversy and confusion perpetuated by sins Nevertheless I remain bowed, broken and clothed with humility- burden by reproach and accountability Yet finding nothing to anchor my soul’s abating hope. Weary in my toil to securely navigate through life’s kaleidoscope – Stretching forth towards the shores of a purgatory for atonement While simultaneously in that very moment having despair condescend upon the banks of my tattered heart. My courage has become a castaway as my pride is submerged within the abyss of disgrace – Has God arbitrarily hidden his face from me or have my infamous deeds expelled me beyond the perimeters of His reach – With nothing to bargain and bridge this iniquitous breach? As these inquisitions run a slow pace through my conscience â €“ Dangling me above the threshold of religious insanity my Christianity becomes senseless and undefined. As I frantically ponder who can restore ease to a warring spirit and reproof to a reprobated mind. Using the last of my desperation- Jesus, I cried emphatically into the silence one last time…. -To be continued -                                            St.Andrew